1. Always open post in timely manner, rather than spend entire days dealing with piles of 'overdue notices' months later.
2. Stop snacking on cheese and pretending this is ok. This is not ok.
3. Stop getting drunk and sleeping with friends on social occasions. There is such a thing as being 'too friendly'. Also, stop kissing 19-year old boys in clubs. See previous note on friendliness.
4. Leave room in tidy and serene state. Do not cheat by throwing piles of clothes into drawers. Out of sight is, quite clearly, not out of mind.
5. Establish how to work central heating. Ask for help from more sensible, knowledgeable housemate if needs be. Do not rise to taunts when housemate realises that one year after moving in, I still do not know how to work central heating.
6. Remove empty products from the shower once they are finished. The edge of the bath is destined for candles; it is not to be used as a graveyard for packaging.
7. Further to previous post, stop doodling in meetings. Instead, take insightful and thoughtful notes. Be professional, in control and intelligent at all times. Try hard not to spill coffee on colleagues in particularly important meetings.
8. Stop wearing short skirts to work just to piss off certain team member who vocally disapproves. This is neither big, nor clever. Though will miss hilarious debriefing with Best Work Friend via instant chat on said vocal disapprove.
9. Cut down on caffeine, alcohol and processed foods. Fill self with peppermint tea, whole grains and water. Pretend withdrawal headaches are not happening and power through like Roman soldier in 300 or Beyonce.
10. Actually stick to above rules. Seriously.
